The Seasons of Marriage

When you spend decades together, your lives go through a lot of changes.  Phil & I spent almost 38 years together and he died just short of our 30th anniversary.  They were mostly good to great years and I often likened our life together as seasons.

Spring is when love blooms. It's full of adventure, fun and sex.  It's the time you get to know each other. You're figuring out how to live together long term.. it

Summer is the hard work stage. It's acquiring stuff: houses, cars. Having kids. It's when you see each others true colors. You settle in for the long haul.

Fall you hit you stride. You bought or build your forever home. Your kids edge toward adulthood, You move back to being a couple again *wink*

Winter is the best season. It's retirement. It's when everything you've worked so hard for together pays off. Your kids move out into the world and start their own season. You reap the rewards of grandchildren. You get to travel, maybe downsize so you can relax a little bit more.

I was cheated out of savoring winter with Phil. And Phil was completely screwed out of spending the last part of life retired, traveling and having grandkids.  Shortly before he died, he told me that having grandkids was the part he was going to miss the most.  And they will be cheated because they will miss experiencing winter with Phil & me.  It's going to be a cold winter...

Phil & his cousin Barb Turner-Sept 2015